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#54330 Three Years

Posted by Christian on 17 June 2012 - 02:41 AM

Over three years ago, on June 16, 2009, GrandTheftGamer and I decided it was time to kick off Subsistence. After weeks of planning, we decided to open up our new RuneScape clan, knowing very well that the clan we came from, The Runite Legion, was in shambles and many of its members were looking for a new place to call home. There's only a handful of people still around today that witnessed the creation of Subsistence. Those days have become a distant memory.

But in the years since then, we have witnessed the rise of an incredible community, one made up of a close-knit but very welcoming group of members, passionate about improving the the clan, making it flourish. This is exactly what has occurred. Yesterday was our official three year anniversary as a clan. Now that it is June 17th, we can officially say that we have been around for over three years, regardless of timezone.

I am writing this because I wanted to take the time to reflect and look back, and if nothing else, pause for a moment and acknowledge just how far we have come. Subsistence started as a group of about fifteen people that were willing to start afresh. I took a lot of flak from some of the die-hard members of The Runite Legion for being a powerhungry prick, just wanting to be in charge. Those that know the full story know that I was banned and told to start my own clan. That is what I did. I did not know what to expect.

Since then, I have had the pleasure of leading a community that has grown far past anything I could have ever imagined. We have been in the sights of thousands of people from all around the world, our website has received over a million views, our in-game clan is larger than 99.8% of all clans in existence, and most importantly, we have done all of this because Subsistence is a place where people can truly enjoy themselves.

I want to thank everyone who has been part of Subsistence and has helped it get to what it is today. This community would be nothing without the people that it is comprised of. I truly am happy to be involved in something so profound. And let it be known that we aren't going anywhere. As our in-game motto says, from the ashes, we rise. That is exactly the story of Subsistence, and today, our fire is glowing as bright as ever. We already have a few things planned that I am excitedly looking forward to releasing. I am looking forward to see what else the future holds for us.
  • Tom, Bad Man, MortalNinja and 17 others like this


#55821 Stop repping my s**t

Posted by Steph on 01 July 2012 - 06:21 PM

You there. Yes you.

STOP REPPING ME. IT'S ANNOYING. I'M NOT FUNNY, I'M TRYING TO BE AN ASSHOLE.

But no, you have to be all "bitch ima like this cause he's black" or something like that.

I will pimp slap you all the way to china town. With a saddle. Because I found 2 saddles on the MC server today, so I am capable of such extreme violence.
  • Joshua, Momo, Drop Bear and 15 others like this


#57723 [Not used]Staff Suggestion

Posted by Steph on 19 July 2012 - 10:05 PM

Hello all,

I'd like to address the activity levels in the upper echelons of this clan. As of late, as many of you have been aware, the amount of activity from the staff has been dwindling. I'm sure that they all have reasonable explanations for why they've been inactive, but that is besides the point. What this is, is a suggestion on how to solve this problem.

At the moment, in the clan, we have regular flow of new members joining our ranks. These are accepted and then validated into the clan. However, a lot of these players go for several months without even coming into contact with most of the staff members. This gives off an "impersonal" feel to the clan, leaving the new clan members on their own to find a way into the clan community. I can imagine this being very off putting, as I remember back when I used to clan hop, when you're acknowledged by someone with "power" in the clan, it builds a relationship with it, an attachment of sorts. This is what kept me in SST when I first joined, as I remember at least 4 leaders posting a welcome message on my introduction topic or saying welcome to me in the clan chat.

However, it's not just new members, but current members also who are slowly loosing their "bond" with the staff. Along with the almost impossibility for demotion, simply the impersonality in which clan matters are dealt with adds a sense of hierarchy to the clan which, although needed to a certain extent, has a negative effect on the opinion of the staff from the average clan members.

Saying which, there are some staff members who area visibly active to the rest of the clan. However this still doesn't seem to do the trick. I'm well aware that there are staff only forums where I'm sure most matters are handled without us seeing anything, but some kind of "confirmation of existence" would never go amiss.

The suggestion would be a sort of "Impeachment" system. Whereby, after a fixed amount of time, if a member of staff is inactive, a topic will be started with a vote on whether or not this member of staff should be demoted. The time period should be different depending on the rank, as obviously giving an admin one week to get active is a bit much. And of course there are exceptions, such as GTG.

And this isn't in-game activity, or IRC activity (as IRC is regularly empty). This is forums. Regular posting, even if it's not of any particular importance, just for us to know that you're there and that you care. Basic housekeeping if you will that always helps with members-leader communications and relationships.

Please note that these suggestions are NOT meant to be an argument starter, or some kind of flame on all of the staff. Just take them into consideration. And yes, I've spoken to some staff members who do see that this is an issue currently effecting the clan, this isn't just a random jab at the leaders.


People supporting this motion

Steph
Antelope
Holy
Momo786
Poe_1
Badly Terman
MortalNinja
Spiny Hollow
Ticklish Kat
Kiza (Kora Spars)
TheRisenGod
Abrogan
ZeeEngineer
Henry (Gonzo Squad)
Kryonite
EatTurds
Lfsmitty
(If you'd like to be added to this list, post below saying so).
_____________________________

Another issue is the approachability of the staff in this clan. As it's been apparent, when someone has a more "forward" suggestion, actively reaching out to the Admins and Senior admins of the clan, as I've said to a few people, what tends to happen is that the player is shot down by a huge response from an admin/senior administrator, basically calling them a retard for saying what they've said. Then the following:
  • Enraged response after enraged response fly back and forth between the two, resulting in the depature of the suggestion maker from the clan.
  • The suggester responds a few times, and after a while gives up and stops caring about the clan, and becomes a passive member.
  • Suggestion is eventually taken into account, but never really fully acted on.
As you can probably imagine, these have negative effects on the clan members, and their relationships with the higher ranks of this clan.

I don't have an actual suggestion on how to sort this, it's more just a kind of insight that a few of us have had on these types of issues.

If anyone wants something added to this, PM me with it.

Thanks for reading,
Stephan
  • Joshua, Bad Man, Momo and 14 others like this


#51015 Clan meme character match (in progress)

Posted by ▗▟▞ ΛΓΤ5Υ ▛▙▝ on 13 May 2012 - 06:16 PM

Went through a tonne of Profiles, topics and posts to sort as many active members as I could lololololollolollolol...

Posted Image
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#79164 Keeping Senior Members "Elite". NEW SYSTEM.

Posted by Poe on 08 June 2013 - 04:06 PM

Just make a new rank called Forum Hater. Throw all the in-gamers there who don't post. Hell, add another called RS Hater for the ones who can't shut up on forums, but don't play RS anymore. At this point, it doesn't even matter. Im sure the ones who don't use the forums, don't care what their forum title is, and the ones who don't play, wouldn't be using an in-game rank. This should not be this difficult.


  • Steph, Momo, MortalNinja and 12 others like this


#34724 Subsistence 2011 Yearbook!

Posted by Fenway on 28 December 2011 - 10:11 AM

So yeah, I finished it. It was actually done on Christmas Eve, but due to me being busy on Christmas, and iMovie and Youtube freaking out, I couldn't get it online until last night.I know it's not perfect, but it's the first one, and there is always room for improvement. Constructive Criticism is allowed, just try not to be too mean about it. I had a problem with the "Ken Burns" crap that makes the video spazz, but it's ok. I know that not all of you are in it, and I'd like to improve that in the future, but quite frankly, my Staff and I could've done better with screenshots.I have ONE typo/Misinformation in the entire thing, and it happens to be on the little title screen thing. *Facepalm*So please, enjoy.
  • Christian, Joshua, Drop Bear and 11 others like this


#32042 A year in Subsistence

Posted by Andrew on 06 December 2011 - 08:38 AM

Exactly one year ago I was looking to join a RS clan. Just googled runescape clans and ended up in RS Directory's Clan List. The first thing I read was:SubsistenceThe site with no level requirements whatsoever! Feel free to join an active, fun clan today!No requeriments, huh? It was perfect for me, because I was a n00b. But the ad lied: Subsistence is not just a clan, it's one of the greatest communities out there, and what makes it great are its members. And that's why I created this topic: to thank all Subsistence members for this great year. I had so many good experiences and in fact, I never had a problem.So thank you all, thanks to you I find Subsistence to be my second family, another home. ;)Thank you, Useph, Poe, Unk, Josh, Momo, Steph, Fenway, Holy, Badly Terman, Deadlycure, MortalNinja, Deathman600, Maker, Sabrina, Linkfiregoron (Shawn), LadyTempaah (aka Xalvior) , Britt, Matthw, Ante, Selene, Airsoftzekk, AtomicSpin, Awrm4909, CaptainLeafy, Deb, Zan Alex, DragRulezAll, Drop Bear, Endo, Funginater, ART5Y (Albert DVX), Ice Fires338, Lancerman, MiniBandGeek, Miner Joshee, Moggings, Ray, Seany, Serpentotia, Spaciouz, ThomasEll (Wizard1) ,KIZA, Zero-Tolerance and of course, GTG. (And any other member I have shared a good moment with but forgot to add :P )
  • Christian, Tom, Joshua and 10 others like this


#89721 Five Years

Posted by Christian on 16 June 2014 - 11:05 PM

Hey guys,

 

I just wanted to give you all a heads up that today was Subsistence's five year birthday.  The clan was founded on June 16, 2009.  This date totally crept up on me and it was not until Josh reminded me that I realized what today was.

 

If you have been here since the beginning, I would like to thank you for your dedication to the clan and your commitment to being apart of our community.  I have no doubts that anyone that joined in 2009 and is still here today has shaped the clan in some way.

 

However, even if you did not join in 2009, but you are here today, it is that that really counts.  Subsistence has gone through many phases and has changed substantially as a result of the dedication of many selfless individuals.  Being apart of the clan today affords you the opportunity to help continue to shape it and watch it grow in a way which you believe is right.  I am looking forward to watching Subsistence continue to change and grow as we move forward.

 

Soon to be five years and counting!

 

-Christian


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#59485 My rant about male & female double standards.

Posted by Turds on 08 August 2012 - 12:04 PM

I don't hit my woman unless she forces me too.

For example: Forgetting to make my dinner. This results in 2 smacks and a punch.


  • Joshua, Spaciouz, slumpmaster prang and 9 others like this


#57610 Leaving RuneScape

Posted by UrASmurf on 18 July 2012 - 04:30 PM

Still a better love story than twilight.

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#34300 Real Life Images

Posted by Steph on 23 December 2011 - 10:47 PM

Posted Image
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#81923 RS3 Interface Layouts

Posted by Unknown828 on 26 July 2013 - 03:18 AM

I feel like mine is the most efficient I could possibly make it. All of this information is essential to my play. I find that the space I have is more then sufficient to play the game. Just requires a bit of camera work to get a monster in a clickable square.

nyriaxR.jpg


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#47175 We've switched to a like system!

Posted by Joshua on 06 April 2012 - 01:07 AM

To avoid users being harassed by massive de-repping, convenience, ETC, we've switched to a like system versus the old +1 or -1 system! So everyone is at a standard baseline, we've also reset everyone's rep.

We apologize to anyone who has lost large amounts of rep, but this seemed like the best solution to an issue with reputation in IPB 3.3.x and my restore, in addition to the previous reasons mentioned.
  • Christian, Bad Man, MortalNinja and 8 others like this


#34221 Poe

Posted by Poe on 23 December 2011 - 02:24 PM

The Beginning
I first started Runescape in 2007 on a different f2p account (whose identity is only known by serpy), for a few months. After a year away from Runescape, I decided to play again but couldn't remember the login name so I started the p2p account Poetent during the Halloween event week of 2008. For the next 8 months I played solo, dealing with little jerks who would rather lie, cheat, beg, and steal their fortune rather than be nice to players and earn their riches. I vowed to never be that kind of player, or person for that matter, no matter how high my levels may get. One day while checking something on Rune HQ, I saw an ad to join a no-reqs clan called The Runite Legion. Being the noob that I was, I figured that was the kind of group that wasn't going to be cruel just because of a person's stats. I clicked the link and was directed to our original forums. I registered, then joined the irc channel, which at the time was being shared between TRL and the new TRL which was later named Subsistence. I had walked into a fight between Useph (Christian) and some members of the old TRL. I honestly wasn't sure which side I was joining. Useph was nice to me and helped me get through the application process. I'm so glad I joined the right side. It was a small clan consisting of: Christian, GTG, Josh, Tom (Ell), Fungi, Antelope, Drop Bear, Pur3_Donut5, Unk, Serp, and I believe MiniBandGeek.

Moving Up The Ranks
After about a month of playing, I was approached about running for a leadership spot. I hadn't really considered it since I was so new, but of course we all were in a sense. I decided to go for it and was voted in as Forum Janitor. After we were gaining a ton of new members, I noticed our RUnehead list wasn't being updated so I started doing it and keeping the clan chat list updated as well as I could. This led to my position being changed to Director of Member Management. In 2010, when Antelope stepped down from his Admin spot, Christian asked Unk and I to become admins. Our member base had grown from the small group to the point we needed an extra admin. Of course I accepted. I always took pride in the fact that I was representing our clan members and tried to speak for them even when my opinion differed from those who had higher ranks or had been here longer than me. Not to say that we argued, but we always kept open minds during debates and worked things out amicably. I've tried to get some things started that I thought would improve the clan. After hearing a lot of players ask for help with skills, I thought of an idea to have mentors to help with specific skills. Sure there are guides, but some people want different options for training. Since I really didn't have time to set it up, I had 2 different members assist me with it, Ray and Serp, but both fell victim to real life stuff that left them with no free time. Maybe someday it will finally get going. I also held a 5 week long Subsistence Olympics in 2010. This was very popular, but I didn't have the time in 2011 to host another one.

Good Times
During my time in Subsistence I've met a lot of nice people and a few that were not so nice. Things like being whacked with a rubber chicken by Momo while going for my smithing cape come to mind. Or, the time Steph had to go to the hospital and his mom got on his RS account to chat with me and Momo for a few minutes..... ah good times! I've always felt like this is a family and you guys were my younger siblings or nieces and nephews. I'll always be there if anyone needs something besides money. I'm not a bank. :)
  • Bad Man, Momo, Seán and 8 others like this


#26052 Clan Emissary Applications Open!

Posted by Fenway on 29 September 2011 - 04:26 PM

Name when first joined the clan: Fenway39 Current Display Name : Fenway Time in clan: Nine Months and 15 days Are you currently in any other clans or RuneScape communities?: No Do you hold leadership positions within any other clans?: N/A What sets you apart in terms of leadership qualities?: I've matured a lot in 9 months, and I think now I'm level-headed enough to take on a job like this. I've always been very willing to communicate with others in the clan, and I'm the most active person (besides Mort) in the Program Department, which requires a very large amount of communication, and I think being the Clan Emissary wouldn't be too hard for me. How would you go around the issue of clan relationships, such as our relationships with our Allies?: I believe the core of strong clan relation's is communication. Even in the real world, communication is the single most important part in foreign policy. If I were to be Elected Clan Emm. I would make sure I am constantly communicating with other clans, and possibly expand our range of allies and friends, always thinking of the Clan Members first, and what they would like to see. In at least 300 words, address an issue or area in the clan you'd like to improve as a leader. You can discuss whatever you feel is appropriate. This can be anything, but preferably related to the Events department: I've been her Nine months, that's a long effing time. I've seen literally dozens of people come and go. We probably get 3-5 applications a week, and every month or so we lose 20-30 to pruning. However, there are a few select few who leave because they decided this clan was not for them. I've been looking over all these incidents and I see a striking similarity between them. Almost all of these people said their main concern with this clan is that they had a conflict with someone else in the clan, and Did not contact a leader. They said they did not think talking to a leader would help, and so they never did it. I would BE THAT LEADER who they can come to. I will Always, without exception be willing to help and listen to somebody. If someone has a problem, I want them to know that they can come to me and I will hear them out and give the best advice I can. Another thing I would like to address is communication. If I were to be elected Clan Emissary, I would be active on all of our allies forums, and make sure the relationship between us tight. When it comes to Leadership, and especially "Foreign Policy" good communication is the single most important thing that can be done. I would keep communication very tight, and would always make sure to relay the information back to the Clan Members. I would also like to start having practice runs of wars. If I were to be made the Clan Emissary, I would make sure that when a real war does happen with another clan, Subsistence knows what to do. I will make sure everyone is familiar with the Clan rules, and to know what happens in the war itself. Disorganization is the worst thing that can happen in a war, and I would like to make sure that never happens.Everybody likes big huge inter clan fiascos. If you were to elect me for Clan Emissary, I would try to get these done. In the actual Olympics, countries from all over the globe compete. Maybe, next time we have an Olympics, we could include more than one clan, and make it MASSIVE and add lots of more competition to it. We would of course have Subsistence winners and stuff but we could also hold global Community-Clan winners. That's what people like, and that's what I want to give people. IF I am to get elected, I would keep my roles in all of the Programs. Good luck to everyone running!
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#20748 Leaving Clan

Posted by Joshua on 22 August 2011 - 02:34 PM

Since you're so intent on leaving, I'll honour that...and ban you for how you treated other members in this topic and the clan chat. The way you acted was outright unacceptable and not something we'll tolerate.
  • Holy, Fenway, Spaciouz and 8 others like this


#88746 Director of Membership Management applications are now open!

Posted by Holy on 15 April 2014 - 05:25 AM

Name when first joined the clan: Holy

Display Name now: Holy

Time in clan: >3yrs

Are you in any other clans or RuneScape communities?: No

Do you hold Leadership positions in any other clans? No

What sets you apart in terms of Leadership qualities?: Nothing

In at least 300 words, address an issue or area in the clan you'd like to improve as a Director. You can discuss whatever you feel is appropriate. This can be anything, but preferably related to the Department of Membership management:

 

When I first joined subsistence, it was my dream to become the Director of Membership Management. I remember when I first joined, a wee lad who had voice cracks every other word and was just entering high school, and looking up to some of the greats (or at least those who I think were okay members of society), and thinking, "god fucking dammit Subsistence sucks dick." I mean, does anyone new even play? We barely ever get new members on the forums, and I never see anyone new in the clan chat. It's always the same five or six people, never talking, not being interactive. And what happened to events? I'm pretty sure nobody is interested. This application is a joke. Does anybody actually read this? We have something like 500 people listed as clan members on runescape, but how many even play? Who the hell is Baukura0? Or Agkr? Or any of the other 487 "members" of the clan that are listed? I'm not sure. After I finished writing my blurb, I realized I was a few words short of three hundred, so I'm typing this sentence in the hopes that I can end off my short piece with 299 words. If I were elected DoMM by you fine people, I would make sure to make Subsistence a better place. If you have a problem? Come talk to Holy! Need a polar bear, or a moose? I'm your guy! I can't do that stuff without being DoMM though, so don't even think about it if you don't vote for me. In short, I hope to change the clan for the better, in both short-term and long-term ways. My plans are to manage the membership, maintain a good standing level of management of the members, and much, much more.

 

Good luck to the other candidates!


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#71822 Director of Membership Management Applications Open!

Posted by Spiny Hollow on 29 January 2013 - 10:17 PM

As a side note before my actual application, the last part of the application confused me, the 300 word thing. It's separated by a colon, yet grouped together, so it could easily be one question or two, it's a tad ambiguous. Vonder answered it as one question, whereas Mort + Seany answered it as two. I answered it as one, so hopefully it's alright.

Name when first joined the clan:
Mining Bill

Display Name now:
Spiny Hollow

Time in clan:
Member since 03 Aug, 2011 - 1 year, 5 months, 28 days

Are you in any other clans or RuneScape communities?:
I have Sal's Forum and Zybez' RuneScape Community profiles dating back to 2007 and 2008 respectively, of which I still occasionally lurk. I also occasionally browse the RuneScape Subreddit, as well as the RuneScape Official Forums, if that counts at all.

As for clans, I am currently not in nor directly associated with any, aside from Subsistence. For a rough look at my clanning history, click the spoiler tag;
Spoiler


What game do you primarily play in Subsistence, and what other games do you play/will play?
I primarily play RuneScape and occasionally play on the Subsistence Minecraft. I am open to playing just about anything.

What sets you apart in terms of Leadership qualities?:
Despite having been in many clans over the years, I've never risen above Leadership Advisory or Temporary Warlord positions in any clan I've been in, as I've always been more comfortable leading from an outsider position. That has been a purposeful act on my part, I've always felt that I can help more by advising. I've always been capable of having leadership positions and have rejected them before; I know I have the experience and technical knowhow.

I have previously stated that I never accept leadership in clans, and that has always been the case. However, I have moved away from my older history of PvP clans with no intention to return, and consider Subsistence my clanning home. At this point, I feel I can be more effective with a more direct leadership role - an iconic step for me, given my beliefs. I've always believed that a person who is capable of doing something should do it, whether they have the rank or title to do so. For the most part, if you have good leaders to begin with, you don't necessarily need to be a leader yourself in order to guide them to a positive outcome.

I have roughly 8 years of RuneScape clanning experience and am quite a social person, always willing to assist clan mates where appropriate, in whatever ways I can. In RuneScape I give whatever advice I can offer to those who seek it, be it quest, levelling, or money making advice. On the technical side of things (although likely irrelevant) I have experience with Cpanel and administrating forum boards + sub boards, although most extensively with SMF forums.

Please share one idea which you have to keep your job relevant in the community in at least 300 words; address an issue or area in the clan you'd like to improve as a Director. You can discuss whatever you feel is appropriate. This can be anything, but preferably related to the Membership Management Department:

I don't have any amazingly innovative ideas because, generally, innovation doesn't work. That's why the most successful clans on RuneScape follow the exact same procedures in order to recruit and operate. In my experience, most clans that stray too far from the commonly accepted methods of clanning suffer from inertia and eventually inactivity; because no one outside the clan knows how to practically approach these unaccepted methods, so they have no impact. Therefore I don't have any crazy ideas like "Let's add a feature to make the entire forum Text-To-Speech", those ideas are awesome if clan members want them, but I've never felt they help a clan grow.

In my personal opinion, Mini's role of "Advertising" is the most important position in the clan, and something all leaders should be assisting with more directly. I personally believe whoever is made the DoMM, no matter who it is, should have a larger role in recruitment than they are currently "expected" to have. Technically speaking, it's Mini's job as the DOA to advertise right? However, the fundamental role in expanding a clan is recruitment, which is something Subsistence has slowly been declining in since the day I joined. Mini does an amazing job when you look at it, and the recruitment team also do an amazing job, except that the recruitment team are far more limited.

Take the RuneScape Community forums for example; there are 4 separate threads related to Subsistence recruitment - One created by Bl4k_4ce in 2009, another by Sacktapped_u in 2009, one by Useph in 2009, all averaging around 300 views total. Then, our most recent recruitment effort, posted in 2011, with 3910 views, by Mini/Steph/Momo(?) has obviously been bumped reasonably frequently. However the major downside of that, is that it can only be bumped by one person, or specifically one account.

I'm not suggesting that the DoA role gets merged into the DoMM role, merely that the DoA role needs more eyes and hands; and membership management is fitting, as that is what the name implies. It is implied that all directors should help out other positions, but it never made sense to me that the most important positions are ultimately directly fulfilled by one person rather than multiple.

The actual roles the DoMM are currently expected to fulfill are quite lackluster and frankly, not Director worthy. Guiding new members, being helpful and mediating chat are things that should happen organically through activity.
Whereas the technical tasks of accepting applications, updating the Runehead, awarding medals and the like, are not demanding; particularly given our application system has practically no requirements at all, and medals are requested and thus managed, not micromanaged.

This is partly why I called upon the Senior Member thread a month ago to replenish the Senior Member ranks with a few new members, there was a clear imbalance between active Senior members and active members, considering the last Seniors moved almost instantly to Director positions. The next step would be to replenish members, and keep that cycle flowing before it stagnates too much.

As DoMM I would focus most of my efforts into expanding Subsistence into a larger clan, as recruitment becomes largely automated once you are large enough. You could consider Irenic a rival clan in this respect, as they are larger than us and have similar ideals.
  • Christian, Joshua, Steph and 7 others like this


#65220 Clan friend.

Posted by Holy on 23 October 2012 - 03:36 PM

For the love of fuck, how did I know this was going to happen. Can we for once just shut the fuck up, remain neutral about things, and leave it at that? Stop bitching like goddamn children, because as far as I know the two of you aren't. Take it to pm's where nobody else has to deal with your bullshit or just part ways.
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#60268 My final complaint

Posted by Matthew on 15 August 2012 - 11:13 PM

-- If you don't like me, then you probably shouldn't read this. Ignore everything if you want. --
-- TL;DR at the bottom --

Ray and Steph made me realize something that went horribly wrong in the clan. I've been in the clan for over a year and lately I've been complaining a lot about really stupid stuff. I could easily go through all the recent posts, and I could quote at least 20 of my posts where I started arguments, got in trouble, or bashed the leadership. It was useless rambling a lot of the time. Two recent ones are with Drag and Atomic. I consider both of you very good friends of mine. I don't know what I was thinking, but I feel so stupid for doing what I did. I'm seriously very sorry. All of leadership, I'm sorry. :(

I mean, come on. Medals. I got pissed off by losing medals. I don't know where that came from, because it's not me.

Why do I get mad/offended/upset so easily? Story time! Every since the 8th grade, I have lived in a very dark place. The closet. I've been picked on, emotionally abused, and rejected by 80% of the people I meet. When I came to the clan, that 80% turned to like 2%. Now, it's about to go back up but I deserve that.. I have my peers, children's parents, church-goers (I go occasionally), and even my stupid family who just destroys my happiness every day of my life. My career has been petitioned twice. I care for children. It's what I love and it's something that makes me smile everyday. You're probably thinking, "No one cares. Stop complaining and move on." I wish some people could live in my shoes for a day. It sucks. I'm stronger than that though. I live to be happy and anyone who says otherwise about my rights, can just go F themselves. Naturally, I get offended quite easily. I'm just a sensitive person. That's all..

For example, a few weeks ago, I woke up and noticed my door was spray painted "Go home fag" It didn't really phase me, but the fact that there are people out there who hate my existence, it just hurts.

So, the clan has been awesome to me, except for a few people who have called me fag, queer, homo, idiot, moron, etc - all the usual stuff. That is a legitimate complaint. It got sorted out for a few people.

I just noticed this is very long, so I'm going to say one more thing.. I'm going to stay completely away from what I shouldn't be a part of. I'm going to keep my mouth shut and just let things be the way they should. Leadership is doing a good job because obviously the clan is still here. They know what they're doing. It wasn't my place to criticize them in any way. The only way I can think to make up for it is to just keep donating to maybe improve the forums or something. Whatever the money goes to.

Thank you for reading. If you made it this far, then hopefully you better understand the way I act. It's still no excuse though, I know that.

 

TL;DR

I F up a lot. Life experiences damaged my self-esteem and control. I'm still a very happy, jolly person and I love life when nothing interferes with it. I'm standing up for what I believe in. Blah blah... and also, I'm opting out of general discussions about improving, feedback, updates, and overall, leadership.
  • Bad Man, Spaciouz, Seán and 7 others like this






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